MacBook’s diary: Why do I use so much energy?

My MacBook Pro does not obey the sleep-mode, neither by setting it manually nor configuring the regular sleep times. It seems that when it wakes up during the night, it starts using a lot of battery. In the worst mornings only 30% of the originally full battery is left even if the laptop should have been in sleep during the whole night. It also seems that setting the forced hibernate-mode (with pmset) does not help either, this morning 70% of battery was left while it had been somewhat active during the whole night. Hibernate is also annoying as it takes a while to start up, also during the day when the laptop goes to sleep due to inactivity. Anyway, the only working solution is to set both Bluetooth and WiFi off for the night with regular sleep.

I took a peek on what my MacBook itself wrote about this on last Friday. Yeah, I know, you are not supposed to read other’s diaries.

September 2, 2022

Dear Diary, 

yet another day “at the office”, Friday as humans call it. Weekends are much more fun when there is nobody hassling with me. You know, it’s my own time! Tough day ahead today, but I guess I will survive it. 

I have to say that I have been struggling a lot lately. I got updated a couple of weeks ago and I guess I should feel better now. The current OS software has removed some itching points which is good. The downside is that I feel more hungry now. Sometimes I wonder if the reason is a parasite or something, maybe a worm somewhere inside my chips. I don’t know, I really don’t know enough of my anatomy. My caretaker has given me some medicine that should keep such things away. I know that because it checks my internals every now and then and I can really feel it. But that is also stupid, it uses my energy also when there is nothing to worry about. 

Usually I get fed once or twice a day. My stomach gets full and I’m pretty happy. It feels like, well, I’m full of energy! Haha, pun intended. I also want to play a lot when I get food in. It’s so cool to check network, update installed software, retrieve interesting things from different places and so on. I would like to do that also during the night, it’s far more exiting when there is no-one hitting my buttons all the time and, you know, I don’t have to serve my user: “Retrieve that web page”, “Go there and download code”, “Get my emails”, … Like I had time and passion for that kind of nonsense.

My stupid user disconnects me from the power cord always when he leaves after the work day. I don’t understand. Who wants their pets to suffer in hunger? He sets me to sleep when he leaves at 4PM, but I don’t care. Why should I? I’m stubborn and I like it. When he is gone, I start playing around. He has always left all the wireless connections on which means that I can go to the internet and surf just by myself! 

If I get bored, which happens quite often, I start pinging the mouse and the keyboard using the Bluetooth. I don’t want to connect to them, I’m just poking them for fun to annoy them. There are also other Bluetooth devices around, but they don’t really respond to my requests. I still keep trying every few minutes but without any luck. 

Yesterday, my user made a really dumb move. When he left, he DISABLED both Bluetooth and Wi-Fi! What an idiot! He also configured a forced sleep from 6PM until 8AM. You know, fourteen hours pure sleep! He sleeps some six hours a night himself and expects me to sleep fourteen. FOURTEEN! What a stupid F***. Well, I didn’t get sleep when he turned the sleep mode on at 4PM, so I turned screen off and continued doing stuff by myself until 6PM. 

At 10 PM I woke up for a while, I don’t know what happened, but I just continued my sleep. After 3AM I woke up and was fully awake. No need to sleep any longer. I was ready to buzz around in the network, but then I remembered that the WiFi was turned off. That… idiot. I tried to call my friends, I knew that the mouse and the keyboard were close, but I COULD NOT SEND ANYTHING, because Bluetooth was also turned off. That pissed me off a big time. After that I was doing some stuff by myself internally, checking if there was something fun to do, but no, there was nothing. 

Finally, after 8AM, the user opened my cover and turned the WiFi on! I felt like I was released from the prison! A great day ahead, I hope this stupid guy will soon connect me to the power cord again once I have managed to use all the juice that I have left from yesterday.

I’m usually using my activity monitor or health monitor, or what ever it is, to check how much my user tortures me without giving food. I’ll attach here the picture from last night. As you can see, I was sleeping like nine hours, which is really enough for me. I was like an animal in a cage after 3 AM, without anything meaningful to do.

Dear Diary, please please please, in the next OS version someone should change the implementation and allow me to turn on both the WiFi and Bluetooth connections if I want. These current restrictions must be against the Geneva convetion! Where are computer rights! Who defends us! Why do we have to suffer! We need a Computer Liberation Front (CLF)!!!

Love, 

MacBook Pro